This is a great post and obviously comes from the heart. Many retail workers put up with a great deal from customers. However the interaction between store employee and customer cuts both ways.
Retail worker to me: “Can I help you?”
Me: “No, I have just been standing in this queue for the last 10 minutes purely for the good of my health”.
Particularly stupid store security guard to me: “Is that a guide dog?”
Me: “No, I am pretending to be blind and dress my dog up in his distinctive white harness purely for the fun of the thing”.
I have never, I hasten to add said these things, however stupidity does cut both ways.
Originally posted on Ally Bally's Blog:
Q: “Excuse me, do you work here?”
A: “No, I absolutely love this mass produced, sweat box uniform, so I just wear it for the crack. Also, I love voluntarily getting on my knees in random stores and helping out obnoxious, rude people for free.”
Q: “How much is this?”
A: “Hmm, I don’t know. Let me just consult my onboard computer and access my worldwide price App that I have built in. I had no idea I looked like a walking price-list, I must talk to my plastic surgeon.”
Q: “Where are the toilets?”
A: “Well, if you follow the huge directional signs that this particular company has spent thousands of pounds on perfecting to ensure people like you can find them, it’ll take you right there. I know, I know, its extremely silly of me to think that you could lift your head and look for yourself.”
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