There was a young man named Keith
Who met a witch on a blasted heath.
Her name it was Joan
And she lived all alone
Until she went and married Keith!
There was a young man named Hatcher
Who worked as a professional rat catcher.
He was helped by his cat,
(A feline called Matt)
And was employed by the late Lady Thatcher!
There was a young nun named Louise
Who’s habit it was to tease.
She donated all of the convent’s resources
To serving members of the armed forces
And she sailed the seven seas.
There was a young minimalist named Paul
Who lived in a very bare hall.
When his friends came round
They sat on the ground
As he had no furniture at all!
There was a young man named Paul
Who lived in a rather grand hall.
His sister named Linn
Sat on a pin.
You should have heard that young lady bawl!
There was a literary critic named Paul
Who wrote a review on a wall.
The book’s author, who was named Howl
Took a large damp towel
And scrubbed the review off that wall!
There was a young man named Mitch
Who was extremely rich.
He attended a grand ball
In a fine old hall
And duelled with a Count in a ditch.
There was a young man named Hogg
Who started a WordPress blog.
It was viewed by him
And a cat named Jim
And was moderated by his girlfriend’s dog!
There was a young firebrand called Paul
Who called for the establishment to fall.
On becoming a peer of the realm
He said “now I’m at the country’s helm
Things don’t look that bad at all …”.